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I stepped in a puddle today. It soaked through the hole at the bottom of my shoe. My foot was wet, and I left a shoe print every place I went.

Today's thoughts consist of these:

I always like the boys I can't have, what's up with that?

Yesterday was a really fun day. From getting cute compliments, to putting wishes in my necklace. I loved all of it.

I want to improve my penmanship.

Hmph! I've made so many new goals. But, I've seem to have forgotten all of them. They're misplaced in my brain. I want to remember them.

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Madd had the most odd dream last night, which reminds me how excited I am for tomorrow night. I just wish I could change a few things about it.

My new addiction- coffee candies, and writing upside down.

Don't ever expect something to happen, because expecting it to, will only disappoint you.

I wish I was good at staying in touch.

I don't think my life is going to get any better then it is now. And I'm so glad.





naked trees, so many leaves you can't see the ground, warm breeze, wearing anything and being a temperature so perfect, darkness arriving earlier, the smell of Halloween costumes, just the word "October". I'm in love with the fall. Allow me to elaborate every chance I get.

I wish that,

I could explain, in depth, every thought running through my mind. I wish I could tell you every emotion I feel. It's just so hard to describe. It's pretty close to every thought, and every emotion mashed up into one. Something without a name, I know that.

I'm so thankful, I'm so sorry, I'm so upset, I'm so fantastic, I feel bad, I feel too happy to explain, I love how my life is going right now. Then again, seeing my best friend cry in my arms, over someone I've only met once, is the most unpleasant, and warm feeling I've ever encountered. I hope he does alright. I hope nothing's wrong. I feel as if this is happening to my family, because I've grown so close to her's. So close, that they ARE my family...and I wouldn't change that for anything. Not even one thing.

Imaginary ordinary.

I'm really, really glad that I'm not a part of the 99.9% of Simi Valley High School that attends the football games every Friday night. My Friday's are so much better without a crowd of people I see everyday at school, surrounding me and acting like they normally wouldn't. It's so nice to get away from those people and enjoy the nice company of my best friends in a little venue, with music and fun filling the air. Walking around the edges of the football field trying to find people to talk to, cannot compare to these nights in any way. Then, coming home and discussing the night with Maddi is the best part about it. Repeating the amazing things that happened, over and over again. Curling up on the couch, or den floor, wrapped in a blanket that barely covers my feet when I pull it up to my shoulders. Watching the first five minutes of a movie that would only be good if you were in one of those moods when you feel like watching a boring movie. Almost falling asleep, then realizing you have so much to tell eachother, that it wakes you right up again. Then, you lay there, and talk for a long time about life, and how thankful we are for eachother. About what we'd say if we had seen a picture of that very moment several years previously. What would we think? Would we be happy? Disappointed? Realizing how funny life is, and how amazingly perfect everything worked out which put you in that situation in the first place. Those are the nights I live for, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Saturday mornings, pizza or pasta for breakfast, usually left over from the night before. Then a nice, luke warm cup of coffee and the adding of honey, cream, brown sugar, and equal makes it beyond perfect. Microwave, then iced, one sip at a time until it's finished and I realize how good that cup of coffee was and how I'll never have another one like it in a long time.
Maddi showering, getting picked up early. Then, that's when "family night" begins. Missing Revive's house show is not going to be worth it. My family just ends up sitting in different rooms watching TV. But, not this time. I'm sure my parent's are in a new phase. The City Walk phase. It came right after the Chi-Chi's phase. And a few phases after the Mexican-themed party phase, and the Buffalo Wing phase. I enjoy these, until I realize how sick I become of the Mexican-themed parties and Buffalo Wings, or the dinners at Chi-Chi's, and finally the midnight movies at City Walk.
Spending the night at home, in my own bed, nobody else there but me on this Saturday night. I don't really understand why that happens. Maddi's not busy, neither am I, so why aren't we having a sleepover?


Maddi reading my blogs with me, makes me extremely uncomfortable.

Longest day of my life.

Sitting here, just here. I don't need to be anywhere else at this time. Kidding, I have to be at a handful of other places. I'm wondering so many things. Things like why a cardboard box stacked away on a closet shelf with no door in B-17, says "E. Lang" written down the side of it in bold black letters. Who is this E. Lang, and do they know that their box is here? I wonder what's inside. I wonder why the other people in this class can't go 10 minutes without talking, but that's probably how they got here...right? Not much is going on today, except in school suspension. I had my phone out in class. That's not fair, now is it?

why?We keep making eye contact. We keep exchanging smiles. Oh, how I wish I could go back in time and change so much from those months at a time.

Everyone who walks in, mumbles, "We've got a full class in here". Even though there's only seven of us.

Honestly, this isn't worth writing about.

No one would riot for less.

I introduced you. I introduced you. I introduced you.
Did you forget about me? Don't you realize?
I really do hate alllllllll of this.
All the time, this happens all the time.
Who knows when I'll learn.
Nothing goes my way...not one thing, ever.
I want what I can't have. I have what I don't want.
Come on! I want a change. I need a change.
But you know, I won't get that.



Of course not, that's not even possible. Never.

Coco is NOT his name.

My weekend started off really fun. School ending at 2:38, then talking to my few friends until 3:05, when Dezzi took us over to Jonny's house for a "getting-nothing-done" band practice. After that, we went to Chipotle and walked around the mall, and then to Funbags. We were all in the car, and decided to stop by my house, before we went to Maddi's to watch Spun and eat. When we got to my house, I walked in the door to find a new puppy running up to the door, with my other dog Mocha. It was such a nice surprise, and I had so many questions, and names for the dog! I thought of so many cute names, but my dad decided to call him Coco. Like really? I would be so much happier with ANY other name.
But when we got to Maddi's casa, the movie got boring so we shut it off, and cuddled on the carpet with Jonny and David. When they left, we chatted in the kitchen, and talked about what was in store for us the rest of the weekend.
We fell asleep, and woke up the next morning to exchange dreams like we always do. Saturday was a really fun day. That's all I can remember. If I could remember what I did during the day, I would tell you in a second.
That night, my mom took everyone to City Walk to hang out, and see a movie. Nothing bad happened at all, fun was flowing through the air. Everyone fell asleep on the way home, and we got to my house and slept forever! Maddi and Kenzie left early on Sunday, and I got ready for an exciting day in Ventura, with Lindsay! It was so much fun. I got enough clothes to fit in a garbage bag. We had so many adventures, from finding Emily in a Kinko's parking lot, to calling some truck driver's boss. We had no idea where we were going any of the time. But it was a really good way to top off my amazing weekend. Besides all the fun I had at the Laker game with my parents and brother, later that night.